Why WebMD is a Bad Idea

Sometimes smart people do dumb things. This is not a new concept. I had one of these moments a few days ago.
Friday night, I slept in my makeup...which I literally NEVER do. I'm not really sure why I did it that night. I must have been awfully tired. Anyway, I paid for it on Saturday morning. I woke up with waterproof mascara ALL. OVER. THE. PLACE. If you're a woman, you know what a pain this is. One does not simply wash off waterproof mascara.
So I'm in the shower, scrubbing my face for dear life...being particularly rough around the eye area. I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to do that, but I did it anyway. I guess at some point I decided it would be a good idea to open my eye, and when I did...my fingernail attacked it. I've poked myself in the eye before...but this HURT. I thought my eyeball had fallen out and washed down the drain. Don't worry, it was still there when I got out of the shower...looking incredibly red. I figured it would be just like any other time the mascara wand decided to pay my pupil a visit and the redness would be gone within an hour.
Three days later, it still looks like this.
Most of my social encounters over the past few days have went a little something like this:
"Miranda...what did you do to your eye?"
"Um...I poked it."
"Well, why did you do that?"
"I didn't do it on purpose..."
I've made John put his med school knowledge to the test the past couple of days and look at it. Last night he told me that he could literally see the scratch. I thought he was just being dramatic, but upon this morning's inspection...there is definitely a raised area like when a scratch scabs over...except on my eyeball. GROSS.
So I did what any woman would do...I got on WebMD and searched "scratched eyeball." Obviously my medical terminology is outstanding. Ten seconds later, I've diagnosed myself with a "Corneal Abrasion" and I'm reading all about how I'm on the path to being blind in my left eye. I sent Amber a Snapchat that said,
"I have a Corneal Abrasion!!!"
She sent one back that said,
"Miranda, get off of WebMD!"
Caught in the act. Of course I continued reading, and it just told me everything that John had already clarified. If it gets worse, go to the doctor. Don't touch it. It's just a scratch. Don't let it get infected.
Stupid WebMD. It scared me to death, then told me it was actually a minor thing. Next time, I'm listening to the boyfriend.
What have we learned from this?
Don't sleep in waterproof mascara...or you will have a scary demon eye for days.

Lisa said...

bahahaha!! WebMD is like a guilty pleasure for me. ya know, when I want to find out how I am going to die at 24! lmao

Jay T said...

Hahaha! i'm so sorry about your eye! That's awful. I refuse to wear waterproof mascara because it's SO HARD to get off!!!It's the stage 5 clinger of makeup (or is that glitter? wait that's the herpes of makeup).

Sam said...

I don't know how many times I've done this also and thought I had cancer and it ended up being a flu or mild cold LOL.

Vicky Hunt said...

I told you it was probably a corneal abrasion....silly! Nathan scratched Aunt Nancy's eye when he was a baby and she had to go to the ER because she was in so much pain. I hope it gets better soon...:) Love you....even with your demon eye!

Love, Mama

DwnInLndn said...

Ugh, i HATE going on webMD. I'll think I'm going to get a solid answer and it's like oh hey your preggers!..or something outrageous. I've stopped looking at webMD. it causes more stress than the actual symptoms itself!

heydanixo said...

In high school my parents threatened to block webMD from my computer because I would always go on there and scare myself lol.

Sara Pilling said...

Hey Miranda. I am sure your eye will be better soon, as for the waterproof mascara, try nivea eye make up remover. Worked wonder on mine the other night. x

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